Married Overseas Filipinos, Pleasure or Pain?

For the girl by chance or fate is familiar and married overseas Filipino or alien, and foreign then guaranteed husband to dignity, in the eyes of people living in Philippines, look at family of the girl with a jealous look, the desire for “marry overseas Filipinos”, “families will be remembered.” As for the Philippines bride, it is a pride, and weave how dream will live affluence, can “cash cow” in a country where people are said to be “paradise”.

Overseas filipinos

Overseas filipinos

Also depend on the purpose of getting married overseas Filipinos of every American is to have the opportunity to “sacrifice their lives” to help parents and brother in Philippines, or there are people who really want to live and cultivate lift happiness our little family. However, for any purpose, too, when the legs and face of American life, there will be many things occur in life that mostly revolves around money.

The Filipino bride after reunited with her husband and began to face American life, the first feeling so down. Knowing that life everywhere has to make a new food, but in America the basic needs of life too. Open your eyes as bills, electricity, water, markets, milk for children, car and health insurance for each member of the family, if any, home insurance, annual land tax, then the damage to repair, and then gifts the wife husband family holidays. Life in Philippines only to eat, wear, furnaces (if sharing her husband’s family, not have to worry much about this), and some where the coverage necessary to buy.

Life in the United States society where the idea is very simple but turned out to be “great”. First, driving, traffic rules to the street, where they sell something. The machinery in use was, to go to school for a few rudimentary English sentences American grocery talking to people, and then go astray to ask how … Want to ask how that was impossible, English not fluent, no expertise, no experience in the United States, the title is the only star that far too. Natural tiny brides find themselves in all aspects of knowledge and culture, just because I lost one of the “voices” (English). I was like a new born baby does not know anything about life, everything from the smallest in this life is to learn.

Want to quickly integrate real life to come to knit for her husband and who have “invisible” but you know what to do now? Me go to the markets of Philippines to assist, please go to some restaurant washing dishes, or luck cleaning house cleaning bath room … to do things that were previously in Philippines, I never thought of. Many people in Philippines are working status, saying that “shouting fire”, or the rich lady who lives in velvet maid, comfortable spending money, want to buy a shirt to buy even spend in effect, poisons, want to buy a pair of shoes, jewelry, wallet not hesitate much. These people naturally to the U.S. position is lowered dramatically, want to buy a shirt have to wait until one sale off (discount) that have reduced several times dare buy. Thought life turned upside down, and they dare to accept their status and circumstances to go wash the dishes, clean the working limbs, and required to spend money to spend on glass?

And suddenly frightened when he saw the U.S. economic downturn, many people are unemployed, and did not know when new jobs. In Philippines, there “sa hole transport” I cook a pot of sticky rice, bread or pushing a car or petty trading in the market for something to survive, and in the U.S. This is not trading style be.

Many expenses are required to have in American life, which is her husband, because his new wife to the United States do not know anything about American life, it takes time to settle in, if that child is wife to the kids and the burden fell on the husband. Therefore the husband should thoroughly calculate the money (because it can not joke with American life), because of the fixed salary expenses arising out of many, and to save a little room itself being unemployed What will happen to the wife and children. Knowing that there are government subsidies, but only for a while, and it is only temporary subsidies to survive, but about the future, homes are at risk the bank last, must have money to hold to time or time range.

Of course for those who live to create happiness for my little family, they agreed to do the manual work, to remove pride ourselves falling over themselves to life from the lowest employment normally. Because after all, where there’s nothing to be ashamed of, his level to where I work at a school and then slowly striving for life “up country”, occupation also honest, I did not do job Where illegal to be ashamed of. Long after work to go home for my family, my wife and children are food, shelter, economic burden sharing with her husband contract or it is happiness, and believes that “the wife the husband of the South China Sea also need “.

Besides so down about life in American society, there is the bride so down about her husband. There are a number of overseas Filipinos in Philippines”Explosion” equally, she went shopping, travel, as artist impressions should spend money like water (but where one understands that money when they want it in the U.S.). “Explosion” is an engineer, have the status, high-paying jobs in the U.S., America is paradise. For this reason the girls in Vietnam as misconceptions about heaven in the United States. When the bride entered the United States then turned back, paradise dream shattered. I have seen many brides “suck up on a sweet” and dared not confide to anyone, because to come My husband does not see that the place is a rental room is separated from the parking garage of the owner , where engineers do not know but just know that my husband is mowing the lawn, wealth, wealth also did not see that one in the bank debt.

Here I want to emphasize the sincerity of love and marriage. I have no opinion is contemptible, the status of high or low, rich or poor. But precisely because the artist impressions and the “explosion” of this guy overseas Filipino contributed to the collapse of happiness. You’re afraid to tell the true circumstances of his life in America, the girl will give up I did not dare take because of their poverty? You want to choose a tender wives, “party chief virtue” but you choose the girls living pragmatic way. Since you are so “broke” so the girls will love you girls live gratitude because they are not taken seriously rich and poor, where is heaven, sometimes the “explosion” of you makes them uncomfortable and not for you.

I have a friend, through a Philippines dating service she in Philippines. He considered eyes and try her heart, very simple my friend. He proved to be a very generous For “sop”, leading the girl to eat in restaurants, leading into the shop selling expensive brands. But once my friends, because this girl straight from the bud is no luxury of eating places, like on popular place, is that expensive brands are not normal for people who like her. In the time we are together and after getting married wait paperwork guarantee she never ask for or mention smart as you must send money for me or my family with what Bay.

And I also have another friend, also through matchmaking familiar with the Philippines girl. He is, when his familiar frankly just workers, living wage, to be frugal, do not have much money, short, straight talk and honest circumstances. So you have two girls scare poor declined because he or she also pretended to accept to get to the U.S. (but you know). After this her 5th are who he wants to marry.

Then the bride was gradually awakened to the “golden dream” and to adapt gradually to the pressure of American life. Take the time to go to work, make money no matter what profession as long as honesty, to or low, must be done, to nurture his family. And she still did not wake dreams, adultery, and look forward to his socks off, but in that in America no one to receive a stable job, no education and more crime her husband, they are not stupid pick a “debt”.

And also you get wealthier husband, “food to” a little, or until “fully fledged” the suitability enjoy, familiar Joneses, the pragmatic lifestyle turned for and instinctively they began “flipping loose” with her husband split their sweet share bùi with. The chorus divorce, division of assets and the husband away almost empty-handed and her husband have to sing the song “I was wrong to put you into this.” And these girls sometimes fall into the trap of the hunting of man hunting girls married off, seducing they divorced and together enjoy a fortune, but when the money runs out the melt.

There is a walk you see each other that overseas Filipinos back to Philippines to travel to the countryside, but for his wife, because gentle country girl, the daughter of Manila relaxed, pragmatic. But I think that place has good bad guys. When used overseas Philippines guy to get to know (through relatives, or there are ways to “explore” his friend) he get for love or money, or is “dream America”, is the main the groom knows best, and if the groom overseas Filipino as “explosive”, there will be time to sing, “I was wrong to put you into this.”

As Filipino brides choose to America to “sacrifice their lives” for my family, as you earn money in America and you “try” or “we” all for her family in Philippines, the husband you will also “manually” with you. Couple living together is like a “pie-pay”, then at some point you will realize that living in this world not because of the food and there is a spirit and happiness. When you live to take advantage and bring happiness to others, how can you ask others to bring happiness to you.

I did not attack or oppose your signaling or helping his parents in Philippines, but you are married, there must be mutual respect, assist in their ability or if there is more than his ability is also discussed with her husband. Because when you only thought is “married to an American to go is with the aim to help the family” that you intend to live taking advantage of someone else, if you want to help your case in Philippines work and signaling also help parents be?

The word happy is I think, comes from the heart and his reason. Whether you live anywhere, any land in the world, who you are, rich or poor, the value of the phrase “happy family”, have the same value and form. Final paradise in the heart of each of us.

Author: Jenny LamJenny Lam
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One thought on “Married Overseas Filipinos, Pleasure or Pain?

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  1. There is no absolute answer for this question. Most of Filipina girls who got married with foreign men overseas are better than get married with local men in the Philippines. I don’t want to be discriminated on these guys. However, guys who live in the West tend to treat women with more respects and manners.

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